Kadin-Part 2

I laid on the table looking at my pnut on the screen as the lady took measurement, wishing Pat was with me so he could see him. She was not chatty and asked few questions, then out of nowhere she said “have you had any bleeding?” I told her no just the little spotting that morning, she went silent and continued looking, looking back now at that moment I knew deep down something was not right but I dismissed it. Then she stopped and said she needed to consult with the Dr. and left. She was gone for 20 long minutes. I just laid there freaking out trying hard not to cry, I saw him moving and I heard his heart so I knew he was ok….right?? Finally she came back and I blurted out “is the baby ok?” She told me my Dr. would get the results and let me know if there was any issues. Would I like a 3D picture??

I left there with my picture and a bad feeling that I tried to talk myself out of. BABY WAS FINE….THAT LADY WAS A BITCH!!! Two days later the nurse called, my scan showed that I had a “Low Lying Placenta” she assured me that it was very common and worst case I would need a c-section. I was ok with a c-section, who wants to push a baby out anyways!! Another scan was scheduled in 3 weeks time to see if the placenta had moved up, I would not make it to that one.

After a typical day at work Pat picked me up and we headed home, he asked how baby had been and I told him all about his movements. I headed straight for the bathroom when we got home, I had to pee urgently! I sat down and when I looked down I froze. …blood….bright red….more than spotting. “BABE!!” I called for Pat and we just looked and decided. …it’s nothing but let’s go to hospital just in case!

I was freaking out…silently because Pat was driving and I did not want him freaking out. “Babe, it’s going to be ok, we will get it checked out but it’s going to be fine!” I just nodded. We had not gone to the main hospital thinking it would be a shorter wait at the other one. They took me in right away and then had an ambulance come and take me to the right hospital. After many hours and test it was determined that my low-lying placenta was near the internal cervical OS and was causing the bedding. Hopefully the placenta would move up enough and the bleeding would stop but I was to keep an eye on it. We headed home exhausted and scared but baby was ok. I had my Dr. Appointment in a day so we would see what she had to say. I stayed home the next day to just rest, the bleeding continued but it was more like a light period.

On Thursday I headed to my appointment alone because Pat had worked the night before so I told him I would go so he could rest. My Dr. did the normal exam and we talked about the placenta position, aside from that I was all good. I made my next appointment and had the sudden urge to pee, I rushed to the bathroom and I was bleeding….bad. I went back and got my Dr. and the ambulance and my parents were called (we have the same Dr.) I was bawling and my Dr. was working on keeping me calm. My parents, Pat and the ambulance arrived at the same time, Pat was crying and holding my hand “it’s going to be ok baby!” all  I kept saying is that I could feel the blood coming out.

I was rushed to the 5th floor and a fetal monitor attached to me. Baby was doing ok but I was still bleeding, it had slowed down but still there. Something that one of the nurses said rang an alarm in me…she said “we are just waiting to get you a private room for medical reasons”. What medical reasons? why would I need to be be in a private room away from the other mothers that were there getting ready to have their babies?….because they knew I could bleed out at any second but no one told us that, but again I silence my internal voice that was screaming SOMETHING IS WRONG! THIS IS BAD! Instead I told myself they were just being nice, wanted to free a bed in the ward, had an extra room. I was moved to a private room and my parents went home and Pat went to work. I was in a hospital…we were ok…we were going to be ok.

Alone I cried….and prayed…whatever you want God, just let my baby be ok, I will go to church more, I will pray more, I will be more charitable, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE LET MY BABY BE OK. I would have sold my soul if I could have but not even the devil was listening. I would pee every 20 minutes and text Pat “no fresh blood”, “nothing this time”, “just a little”, that was the conversation the entire night. Friday came and during rounds the OB told me I had “Placenta Previa” and that was what was causing the bleeding, again the hope was that the placenta would move up and away from the uterine opening,”we need to get you to 24 weeks” is what the OB said, I was at 22, if the baby comes now there was nothing they could do I was told. 2 weeks. All I had to do was go 2 more weeks.

Saturday morning I was taken to have an ultra sound so they could try to determine where the placenta was and see what the next steps would be. I was wheeled to the office and as we neared the door I could hear sobs, soul wrenching sobs, the OB looked down at me and said “sorry, you will have to wait a little longer someone just got bad news in there” I sat there rubbing my belly and I could feel Kadin moving, he was ok. PLEASE GOD LET THIS BE OK. The soul wrenching sobs stopped and it went deadly silent, the OB came back and said we were going to a different room than the one I was supposed to be in, the lady that had gotten bad news was still in there, they had to sedate her.

The OB was explaining what she was looking for when Kadin came into view, he was moving around like it was his job and I laughed, the OB laughed and said “you have a happy active baby in there!!” another OB came in and I tuned them out, I focused on the little bean doing acrobatics on the screen. I should have knows that having two OB’s looking at the screen for over one hour is not a good sign, but I am glad I have the memory of that hour watching Kadin dance. Once they were done they did not tell me what they found just that on Monday I would be seeing Dr. McGrath and he would put a plan of care in place. GREAT! I love plans, I can follow directions to a T!

Part 1
Part 3
Part 4

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